The World According to Tiff Sniff

Meandering ponderings and wonderings on the state of things.


Subliminal Plastic Motives

Songs in my head today (so far - it's still early)

1. "So Low", by Self (woke up singing it),
2. "Want To" by Sugarland (heard it in the car on the way to work),
3. "Bootylicious", by Destiny's Child (courtesy of JT),and
4. "Hot for Teacher" by Van Halen.

The last, I believe, prompted by someone saying "She's got it bad" as they walked past my desk a while ago.

Excuse me while I fire up the iPod.

Famous people I see in my sleep

New readers to this blog may not realize that I dream fairly regularly about celebrities. Never the ones I'm obssessed with, but random people that come from nowhere. I haven't posted any in a while, because I haven't remembered the dreams vivdly enough to feel like it was worth it.

Last night, however, I had a sort-of celebrity dream. Sean from Jetpack UK (or "Jetpack Sean", as he's known to some) got a job at my company, as our new administrative assistant. He and I ate lunch together in the kitchen. Nothing too exciting, but the best Celebrity Dream I've had in a while.

(Previous Celebrity Dreams can be found here, along with another sort-of CD here.)

(Has it really been a year since I've had a bona-fide CD? Heavens!)

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In other news, I need a new alarm clock. Does anyone out there have any recommendations?

I prefer cheap (for obvious reasons), battery-powered, and obnoxious. Also, it has to have a snooze. I can take or leave a radio.

Let me know if you think you have the perfect one.

Thanks for nothing

So after playing this game the other night, all I can think of for post titles are naughty things. Thanks, JB.

Anyway, have you heard the rumor that the Police may be playing Bonnaroo this year? I almost cried when I saw that. Because, Nashville being the non-conert-drawing city that it is, they probably won't play anywhere else nearby. But I can't go to Bonnaroo because I don't have the vacation time. Plus, I really don't want to deal with going to Bonnaroo. I might just throw up if it turns out to be true. Sting! How could you do this to me?

In other news, despite eating leftover beef stew for the last 2 days, I'm still craving peanut butter. I wonder if there is some other nutrient I'm missing. I don't know. But I think I'm going across the street to get a PB cookie. Toodles!

(That was for you, Mel.)

I (heart) WRLT

First, Lightning 100 (or 100.1, or WRLT) has begun live streaming once again. (I think I mentioned this already, but it bears repeating.) This is the best radio station I have ever listened to anywhere. When I was in LA and England, I got through many a vicious study session by listening online to the sweet sounds from home.

My heart broke when they had to stop. Now, though, the fates understand that all people everywhere need access to this station, and they gave been allowed to start again.

Anyway, as testament both to the general quality of their programming AND to just how in sync they are with me, personally, they played "The Battle of Who Could Care Less" just a little while ago. Like they understood that it's been playing in my head since last weekend, and they wanted to help me out on a long, slow Friday afternoon.

So happy weekend, everyone. Good music has triumphed once again. (This is becoming a theme, I fear.)

Thursday Things

First, a couple of observations:

1. Rumors of reunion tours for both The Police and the Spice Girls: if either or both of these happen, I will absolutely die. Then I will come back to life and go and sell my right arm to pay for a ticket.

2. Clearest sign I haven't had enough protein of late: I've been craving peanut butter. I never crave peanut butter. Weirdness.

3. Rolling Stone magazine has declared the death of the music business. Well, at least the CD-sales side of it. Unless and until the labels figure out how to make money in other ways, they will all go under. Very profoud, Rolling Stone. Exactly what everyone in my Music Business class concluded in 2002.

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Second, a Thankful Thursday post (which I've wanted to do for a while, but can never seem to remember on an actual Thursday):

Things I'm thankful for today:
1. The safe arrival of Noah Michael (see previous post) and his and his mother's health.
2. My best friend, with whom I can talk about anything. Also for the amazing conversation we had last weekend about, well, everything.
3. My job - especially with the new position and new desk, but even without that, I'm grateful to be in a much better place than I was one year ago.
4. Josh Ritter. I know I said it already, but his music is doing me good this week.
5. The new episode of "The Office" tonight. Jim Halpert, here I come!

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Finally, A Final Farewell (or, This Has Been a Long Time Coming):

Met 9 years ago. Hit it off instantly. Got very close very fast.

Lived in different states, so never crossed the line into Dating.

But fell in love with him, anyway. Never got up the nerve to tell him anything, though.

After moving to yet another state, started noticing our relationship becoming strangely one-sided.

Got tired of always being the one to pick up the phone to call.

Decided to not call, in order to see how long it would take for him to notice and call me.

That was 6 years ago, and he still hasn't called.

In the end, I think it was the right move, as much as it still hurts sometimes.

Baby Noah is here!

(3 posts in one day is a record.)

My oldest (to me, she's not that old) friend in the world, Lisa, gave birth to her first child this morning. He looks like his proud papa. He was 10 lbs, 4 oz, and 22 inches. Lisa was in labor for 58 hours.

You can honor her by checking out the pictures I've put on flickr and commenting on how beautiful and perfect this child is.

Here's a teaser of me, mom, and baby:

Noah, Aunt Tiff and Mom


The rest of the pictures can be found here.

New Template

Yes, it's still me! But this is prettier than that old setup. And it goes with my new profile pic much better.

Songage

I really, really love "Kathleen" by Josh Ritter. Also "Snow is Gone".

Good music can cure the ills of the world.

Crazy

Highlights of my work week so far:

1. Yesterday, I got to hold a $1.5 million check. I only wish it were for me.
2. Gnarls Barkley at my office for a meeting today.
3. Moving to my new, larger, work area, where I have sole musical control.

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Songs stuck in my head the last few days (for Mel and JT):
1. "The Battle of Who Could Care Less", Ben Fold Five. I think brought on by my decision to paint my fingernails black this week.
2. "Lips of an Angel", Hinder. I HATE, HATE, HATE this song, but wake up singing it a lot.
3. "I Will Follow You Into the Dark", Deathcab for Cutie. Not a huge DFC fan, but I really like this song.
4. "Crazy", Gnarls Barkley. Self-explanatory.

Tomorrow I get to have music at my desk again. I can't wait, especially now that WRLT is live streaming again.

Open memo

Dear Shane West,

Please find, and use, a razor.

Sincerely,
Tiffany

PS - Michelle and I would both appreciate it if you would tell Goran Visnjic to quit wearing turtlenecks. Thanks!

Monday update

Hey, guys! Thank you all so much for your support last week. (Chris, I'm still waiting on those Tony Robbins materials....)

Things have gone quickly uphill for me, thankfully. Sometimes we all just get in a funk, I know, and that's where I was. It was just particularly bad because some issues resurfaced that I thought I had pretty much settled. So I'm working on those, once again, but it feels much better now that I have actions to take.

One huge piece of great news that helped a lot - I got a promotion on Friday! It was completely unexpected. In fact, part of what was going on last week was that I was making a lot of stupid mistakes and felt pretty incompetent. So to be called into my team leader's office and told that I would start reporting directly to her, and no longer to a supervisor, went a long way toward restoring my confidence, at least about work. But you know how it is - it trickles over into everything.

So thanks again for your kind words, prayers, thoughts, all of it. I love youse guys!

Friends, I am asking for your prayers for me this week. The last few days, a lot of the ugly voices have resurfaced in my head. Voices that have been silent for a long, long time.

And all of a sudden, I'm 9 years old again, helping my teacher grade papers during recess because I know if I go outside, none of the kids will play with me.

The voices are telling me about all of the "proof" in my life showing that I'm not that cool/wanted/missed - the 4th-grade recesses, the life-long lack of attention from the opposite sex, the fact that I was unemployed for three years, despite having a presumably valuable degree and great resume and interview skills.

Lately there have been several happenings that have seemed to reinforce all of this, that have followed this same pattern of being left out, overlooked, forgotten, or just plain unwanted.

And so I'm not sleeping well, so I'm exhausted, and I'm doubting every aspect of my life - my job, my church, my social circle, everything.

I'm not asking for pity or, heaven forbid, advice, but just your thoughts and prayers. I know at one level that this isn't real, but I'm having a hard time believing that right now.

I want to fight this in a healthy way. It's tempting for me to just disappear into work, into surface relationships with people I don't know, into books and movies and TV, into food. I don't want to end up more hurting and lonely for walking away from this rather than fighting it, but right now, I know I don't have the strength.

Sorry for the dump today, but I am flooded and overwhelmed right now, and needed to get some of this out. And I know that there are people reading this who care, and who will stop and offer me up to the Lord. Thanks for that. It helps to know that.




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