The World According to Tiff Sniff

Meandering ponderings and wonderings on the state of things.


In which an amusing anecdote occurs

Mr. Woodard appeared in child support court today. He had a court-appointed attorney, who didn't show up. (This attorney fails to show up on a regular basis. He doesn't receive so many appointments anymore.) His situation was this: he had entered a guilty plea and had been placed on probation. Today was a review of his case, to make sure he was making his payments.

When his plea was entered, he gave the court his employer's contact information, and the court has been garnishing his wages. Mr. Woodard had the pay stubs to prove it. The problem was, the money had not been credited to his case. Somewhere, most likely, a number was transposed or written incorrectly, and the money has probably been going to another case. So the judge asked Mr. Woodard if he could talk to his boss, and get a copy of the wage assignment. That way, the court could figure out if the mistake was something the employer had done wrong, or something the clerk's office had messed up.

Mr. Woodard didn't understand.

Mr. Woodard was also visibly drunk. Or high on something funny. He was very vocal and emotive and demonstrative, and not very lucid. He kept referring the judge to his pay stubs, which clearly showed the money being withheld. When the judge replied that he needed the paperwork from his employer, Mr. Woodard thought he was going to go to jail if he didn't have it. It was an amusing exchange.

The best part, though, was when Mr. Woodard responded to the judge's question with, "Well, you can see there, bra, they been takin' my money like you said they was supposed to."

Bra! He called the judge bra. Not sir, not even man, bra. Fortunately, he was too intoxicated to realize the whole courtroom behind him burst into laughter. Somedays, I do actually enjoy my work.

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