Well, after a long, emotional couple of weeks, I woke up feeling rested and refreshed this morning. I am learning things about myself, a lot that I don't like, but that I need to deal with. I think it's the knowledge that I can deal with it, and hopefully move on, that makes me feel better.
Church yesterday was amazing. I sang on praise team, so I was lucky enough to get it twice. Two men in our community spoke on their struggle with and recovery from alcoholism. I can't put into words how powerful that was, especially to those of us with close friends and family who struggle with substance abuse. The first song we sang afterwards includes the words, "Blessed be the Lord, who would not give us up." I was in tears and nearly had to stop singing. God is amazing in His faithfulness, and I hate that I am so quick to forget it. How could anyone resist a One who would go to such lengths to show us His love? Why would anyone try? I pray earnestly that I will not give up on myself, since He will not.
This week promises to be as frantic as the last. I'm enjoying a last few quiet moments before I jump into my day. I have lunch with a friend and co-lawyer, then I'm off to the Supreme Court for research. Tonight I have a meeting, and then will have to work on processing what I've researched. Tomorrow looks to be much the same. I'm having lunch with another friend who will lead a mission trip to England with me this fall, and a deacon from the church. We are still in the early, early planning stages, but already things are coming together well. The meeting tomorrow is to find out what church resources we will have access to while we fundraise and recruit people to come with us. Hopefully we can have an informational meeting in about a month with everyone who is interested in going.
I want to stay focused today on who I want to be, and who God wants me to be. I want to seek His heart, and to understand what He wants me to do. I feel called to use my skills and degree to minister, but I'm not sure how. There are so many ways to do it, and at the same time, I feel so unqualified for any of them. But I will trust in His faithfulness and His Spirit to lead me where He wants me to be, if I can only learn to be still and listen.
Church yesterday was amazing. I sang on praise team, so I was lucky enough to get it twice. Two men in our community spoke on their struggle with and recovery from alcoholism. I can't put into words how powerful that was, especially to those of us with close friends and family who struggle with substance abuse. The first song we sang afterwards includes the words, "Blessed be the Lord, who would not give us up." I was in tears and nearly had to stop singing. God is amazing in His faithfulness, and I hate that I am so quick to forget it. How could anyone resist a One who would go to such lengths to show us His love? Why would anyone try? I pray earnestly that I will not give up on myself, since He will not.
This week promises to be as frantic as the last. I'm enjoying a last few quiet moments before I jump into my day. I have lunch with a friend and co-lawyer, then I'm off to the Supreme Court for research. Tonight I have a meeting, and then will have to work on processing what I've researched. Tomorrow looks to be much the same. I'm having lunch with another friend who will lead a mission trip to England with me this fall, and a deacon from the church. We are still in the early, early planning stages, but already things are coming together well. The meeting tomorrow is to find out what church resources we will have access to while we fundraise and recruit people to come with us. Hopefully we can have an informational meeting in about a month with everyone who is interested in going.
I want to stay focused today on who I want to be, and who God wants me to be. I want to seek His heart, and to understand what He wants me to do. I feel called to use my skills and degree to minister, but I'm not sure how. There are so many ways to do it, and at the same time, I feel so unqualified for any of them. But I will trust in His faithfulness and His Spirit to lead me where He wants me to be, if I can only learn to be still and listen.
